'The Vow': You'll swear you've seen it

A breakable vow: Rom-com cliches run rampant in 'The Vow,' starring Channing Tatum and Rachel McAdams. (Credit: Kerry Hayes, Screen Gems)

The Vow (* * out of four, PG-13, opens Friday) promises tried-and-true rom-com formula and delivers, treading in sappy, cliché-ridden turf.

It may appeal to the most rabid fans of tearjerk romances like The Notebook, but it's a hard-to-swallow, maudlin tale. Nearly every move feels calculated to wring tears or dopey grins, beginning with the choice of the starring couple. Channing Tatum and Rachel McAdams are blessed with substantial swoon-inducing attributes but seem to be going through the motions.

They meet cute, fall fast, wed adorably. Then tragedy strikes.

McAdams plays Paige, an artist who clicks quickly with the hunky and sensitive recording studio owner Leo (Tatum). They marry in a hastily arranged service in Chicago's Art Institute, apparently without official sanction. But that's how this cute, slightly rebellious couple rolls. They also take dips in icy Lake Michigan in their underwear and eat waffles and chocolate truffles for dinner. In other words, they're Hollywood-quirky.

One night while driving in a snowstorm, they lean over to kiss and are hit by a truck. Paige is thrown through the windshield and Leo sustains minor injuries.

When Paige regains consciousness — her thick curly hair and unblemished face intact — she has no memory of Leo or their life together. Her parents (Sam Neill and Jessica Lange) swoop in to rescue their daughter, though they had been estranged from Paige prior to the accident. They'd never met Leo and are, inexplicably, determined to wrest their twentysomething daughter from his loving clutches. But these are caricatures of controlling, wealthy people and Leo is just the slightest bit boho, which to them translates into threatening.

Meanwhile, Paige reverts to an earlier Stepford-like persona. She dons bland preppy outfits instead of her cool vintage clothing and is shocked when she sees a small tattoo on her back. Her amnesia may have erased five years of her life, but it's hard to buy how she re-invented herself so thoroughly from straitlaced country-club girl to a free-spirited sculptor in the first place.

Leo decides he must woo his wife all over again, banking on the hope that she'll revert to the arty Paige with whom he fell in love. But their romance is slightly more complicated the second time around. An old fiancée re-appears and family secrets are spilled. Still, there's never any doubt whether love will conquer all in this predictable wannabe heart-warmer.

Paige and Leo's tale is based on the true story of Kim and Krickitt Carpenter. Married in 1993, they were in a car accident 10 weeks later from which Krickitt awoke with no recollection of Kim. They married again in 1996 and wrote a book about their saga, also entitled The Vow.

When it comes to romances in which an accident figures prominently in the plot, 1995's While You were Sleeping did it better. It featured more likable characters, heartier wit and more romantic chemistry.

For all of Leo's voice-over musing about "moments of impact" that change lives, The Vow makes little cinematic impact and will leave all but the most starry-eyed unmoved.

Movie Trailer: