Inside: Pete's Satire

Lampooning the Lounge

By Richard English

Special to Metromix
May 7, 2008

 
Critic's Rating:
4

Inside: Pete's Satire

Doesn’t it seem, sometimes, that we Americans aren’t especially good at hanging on to our historical landmarks? Sure, we look after the biggies (New England has developed a robust industry out of showcasing each and every place George Washington ever took a dump), but our cities are replete with…well…let’s call them second-tier landmarks, that rarely, if ever, garner any serious protective energy from the well-meaning or the politically connected. Case in point: the Great Bars from Times Past.

Denver has always had a thriving tavern scene. It wasn’t that long ago that our city was home to the top drinking establishments found anywhere between New York City and San Francisco, and that tradition of excellence continued right on through the twentieth century. During the great cocktail craze of the 1950s and '60s, Denver boasted chic lounges by the dozen, zesty bastions of style and wit. Very few of these places are still with us. Luckily, Pete’s Satire Lounge is.

Drinks: These days, Pete’s is a beer and cocktail joint, heavy on the beer, of which they have a nice round selection, and serve by the bottle or in twelve- and twenty-ounce drafts. But go ahead and order any mixed drink your dipsomaniacal little liver desires. The barkeeps are, for the most part, skilled in the mixological arts and, contrary to many Colfax saloons, the bar itself is stocked with the necessary ingredients for making many of your classic cocktails. (I recently went on a hunt for a simple old-fashioned and Pete’s was the only bar out of five that could pour a proper one.) No matter what you order, though, strong pours are the order of the day, so you can count on being able to taste the alcohol in your alcohol.

Décor: You get your first big gulp of The Satire while you’re still out on the sidewalk. For decades, that big neon-and-chase-light sign has been attracting drinkers like kittens attract goofy grins. Before you go inside, take a few moments to soak in its red glow. It’s like a history tan.

Inside, the main room is somewhat narrow and dominated by a long bar. Lightly stained, the wood reflects light from several overhead fixtures and gives the room a congenial air. The stools are covered in red Vinyl and, even though they are bolted in place, are nicely spaced for a limited amount of elbow wrestling with your neighbor. Mid-way along the opposite wall an archway opens onto a relatively nondescript second room, roughly the size of its partner, but stuffed with tables and red Vinyl booths. The lighting isn’t as agreeable back there, but there are seats aplenty, and the crack staff will make sure you don’t miss out on any drinks.

Crowd: Day or night, The Satire crowd tends, on average, to be a tad older than your typical Colfax boozery, but finding a friendlier gaggle of barflies would be a bit of a task. The daytimers are the type of folks who always sit on the same stool and order the same drinks. Everyone seems to know everyone else, but it’s not clannish, and newcomers are quickly welcomed into the family. One or two visits in, and someone will buy you a round. And he’ll do it just to be sociable, with no hard-nosed expectation of reciprocation on your part. Come nightfall, the range of humanity widens, but only by a degree or two. There are a few more twenty-somethings thrown in the mix, alongside a loyal contingent of Night Knights there to shoot the bull with their pals over a few tall-n-frosties or watch a ballgame. Summed up, Satire people are no-frills people; blue-collar and proud of it, no matter their age.

Bottom Line: With so many of Denver’s milestone watering holes going by the wayside (witness the recent and lamentable demise of the legendary Cricket on the Hill) it’s more important than ever that we hang on to the ones we have. And in the case of Pete’s Satire Lounge it’s easy to do. Easy because, while it’s not the trendy haven of yesteryear, it’s still one hell of a fine bar. Good service, cheap prices, excellent crowd. If you’ve never been, it’s time, and if you haven’t been in a while, make a return trip. It does a body good.

Pete’s Satire Lounge
1920 E. Colfax Ave.
Denver, CO 80206
303-322-2227

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